Personal Essay #1

Illustrated by Jacqueline Davis Moranti

I knew I was different. In grade school, all the kids would ask me and my brother what we "were" and because of my naive innocence I thought it was cool to be like everyone else. I'd answer with supreme confidence and say, "I'm a girl just like you, with a cool complexion and frizzy hair." That wasn't enough for them, they wanted more, they wanted to dig deeper and figure out what exactly made me, me.

 I could speak English, albeit, not the best English. My native tongue, Spanish was far better and always tried to show itself in every situation, during my early years. I lived the first decade of my life in the Bronx, of New York, in a neighborhood populated by many other Spanish speaking inhabitants. It felt like home, it felt normal, no one stared at me in awe or disgust because of my ability to speak it. And then of course my parents wanted to uproot and live a different lifestyle. That's when it all changed. Living in a neighborhood where no one speaks my native tongue, was weird to me. At such a young age, making new friends was difficult especially because of my broken English. School became a hassle, between trying to study and read in English and trying to communicate with the wold around me, all I had was my family. 

My struggle only made me push myself even harder. By putting away my Spanish/English dictionary to help me translate everything into Spanish, I realized I was cheating myself and not fully capitalizing on my potential. Drawing also became a way for me to communicate, and it became the easiest way. Drawing everything from boys, what was on menu for the cafeteria, what shoes were all the rage to what we were reading in literature class. Sure, it was unconventional but it helped me develop my English vocabulary skills and introduce new friendships. 

I never gave up, I kept my eyes on the goal which helped me become who I am today. Gone are the days where I had to prove who I am or what I am because I am me, and me is all that you will need to know.