Hello 2019

Illustrated by Jacqueline Davis Moranti

Here we are, smack dab into the new year of 2019. I couldn't be much happier that it's a new year, I have a lot of high expectations but only because 2018 was an interesting year. There were some lows, there were some highs, but after getting through the deeply emotional stuff, i'm much stronger now. I feel much more free with my feelings and mind coming into this new year, even though I got here with a few struggles and tears in tow because of reasons too personal to speak about in detail here. I'm happy to have gotten through them by being focused and in control of my own pursuit of happiness. My own happiness. The most important strength I have gained this year, is having control over what influences me from the outside. Not everyone around you is going to be a positive influence, thats just reality. There is anxiety, stress, frustrations, and judgements all within us all the time, unconsciously. Difference is in how we reflect these things on the outside, how we interpret them, and how we work to turn them around. This past year, I learned the hard way. It was difficult but it was also the best way for me, controlling my emotions through the tough situations. And if I couldn't control a situation coming at me from the outside, then it was is best for me to walk away or move on from the things that felt negative for me. Maturing is learning when drama is not needed in ones life, harping on negativity is never worth mulling over. 

The only drama worth keeping in your life is the one found in books, movies, entertainment, art, etc! I'm not really big on writing down, or even preaching what my resolutions/ goals are an endless path i'm committed to. My goals will go with me until the end of my life, there will be many of them, big and small, sitting on my shoulders like people reminding me to congratulate myself when one gets checked off. My goals don't hold me down, they inspire me to think bigger. When I create, I want to always be evolving, which means perfection is thrown out the window. Evolving to me means, falling down and getting up, keeping in mind the experiences from before. There is no such thing as weakness.

By giving myself no time limits in my dreams, keeps me content and keeps me moving. My heart won't ache if it doesn't happen tomorrow or in the next few weeks from now, i'll work slowly and happily towards my dreams. Every. Single. Day. Of my life. And, this is the hardest part to commit too, but there will be no comparing myself to someone else's life. I have to keep reminding myself that there really isn't a way to compare to one another since we are all individuals on different paths. That is what should be celebrated when looking back at 2018. 

Let's go into 2019 and use 2018 as a lesson on how we should always cherish what we are lucky enough to have and to have worked towards. but also as a lesson to not be so hard on ourselves when life feels so far from "Perfect." Perfection is just a disguise which social media often refuses to reveal. Let the real you shine!